7 Habits of Highly Successful Teens
Habit 5
5. Seek First to Understand, and then to be Understood
Because most
people don’t listen very well, one of the great frustrations in life that many don’t
feel understood. This habit will ensure your teen learns the most important communication
skill there is: active listening.
Why is this
habit the key to communication? It’s because the deepest need of the human
heart is to be understood. Everyone wants to be respected and valued for who
they are-a unique, one-of-a-kind, never-to-be-cloned individual. People won’t
expose their soft middles unless they feel genuine love and understanding. Once
they feel it, however, they will tell you more than you may want to hear. People
don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.
Listen with
your eyes, heart, and ears. 7percent of communication is contained in the words
we use. The rest come from body language (53 percent) and how we say words, or
the tone and feeling reflected in our voice (40 percent).
Most people are
eager to talk and rather talk than listen. We have one mouth and two ears. This
means we should listen twist as much as we talk. We should actually learn more
while listening rather than when we talk. Learn to listen and listen to learn. Listen,
really listen, for understanding. Seek first to understand then to be
understood-LISTEN
CHOOSE THE RIGHT
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